Secrets Lanzarote Resort and Spa

Overview: On my last day of my all inclusive stay at the secrets Lanzarote adults only with my girlfriend, will now compile the pros and cons of this hotel

PROS: Great staff, very friendly, accommodating, well trained , we upgraded half way through our stay to preferred club AI and we got a better room for the same price as a lower tier room. Special shoutout to Noemi from the reception team, Isabel from guest experience who also works as a host for some restaurants and Pedro the waiter who served us in barefoot and portofino who made our stay more enjoyable.

Good cocktails/soft drinks, no pre mixed nonsense, all freshly made, top shelf alcohol, international brands, Bacardi, Havana club, Fanta, coca cola etc

Food in barefoot very delicious, the best nachos I've ever had , burgers taste fresh not cheap both beef and chicken burgers everything just seemed better quality for all inclusive grub , portofino also very delicious and went multiple times alone for the garlic bread was very delicious, desserts also all made in house by hotel pastry chef, all fresh and taste well made and more mass produced. Also get unlimited a la carte visits during your stay

Hotel is beautiful, grounds well kept, the aesthetics are beautiful and does tie it well with the area doesn't feel out of place, pools were well kept, clean.

Location is great, not too far from the airport,15 mins taxi, shops are nearby in the marina area a 10 mins walk so not too isolated from things nearby

Gym is well maintained, 24hours so can train anytime, decent space with fair amount of equipment

Spa is beautiful, very relaxing and smells amazing, massages very professional and staff in spa knowledgeable and friendly

Padded sunbeds, none of those thin cheap mesh ones which does making relaxing that extra bit more comfortable, some of them have wheels too making it easier to adjust to the sun moving during the day, also loads available you do have the odd reserving from sunrise but plenty available in good spaces near pools.

Rooms are nice, clean , not the most modern but well kept,spacious, and have the biggest TVs I've had in a room about 60"

CONS: World cafe is poor mainly for lunch and dinner , very limited options for a buffet, more dessert options then actual food, very pork heavy so for those who don't eat pork or like pork you'll struggle to find something to eat here as often I left the world cafe due to not having something to eat and going to the a la cartes. I also felt the hosts were often not at the entrance so led to us having to wait a while to get seated to a table.

Bluewater grill is mediocre, steaks weren't cooked great and were often undercooked, also felt the sides of vegetable that came with the main courses felt messy and random. Never tried oceana for dinner so can't comment.

Waiter service near pool areas often slow, incorrect, sometimes would go a hour without a waiter coming round to our area to take orders, I do feel like compared to a secrets/dreams chain in the Caribbean it's night and day, staff feel more lax here and seem to be serving with a lack of haste compared to Caribbean. Often had to go to the bar to get a drink, not something I associate with 5 star luxury resort .

Coco cafe the on site coffee /patisserie, drinks weren't great in terms of the iced coffees felt cheap tasting maybe it's the milk wasn't a fan, also confused why it doesn't open 24hrs like in the Caribbean.

Room service €10 charge for delivery, not really consistent with the secrets chains in Caribbean where it's usually free, considering this hotel roughly costs similar to it, I expect the same amenities and perks. After all the restaurants closed at 10 there's no way to get food in the hotel unless you pay for room service which I think isnt very 5 star feeling, should have a late night snack bar that's part of your AI stay.

I upgraded from non preferred to preferred for the last 4 days of my stay costing €270 euros so about 65 euros a night. I'm not too sure it's worthwhile, we got access to a pool only for preferred guests, extra amenities like crisps in the mini bar , lounge access which isn't really good just some wraps and soft drinks, and the preferred lunch in oceana which is really the same menu items as barefoot barring a few items and preferred breakfast in portofino. I didn't really enjoy either so personally I wouldn't upgrade if I came back.

No self service dispensers for drinks around the resort, this is a adults only resort so the fact there is no self dispensers around the resort is strange, similar to a riu concept, think it would alleviate being dependent on staff to serve and accommodate, I know this hotel isn't just all inclusive it's also b&b but maybe having a scanner like for your room to activate dispensers so it's not abused by people on a different board basis

Staffing issue, a couple days there was no pool waiter service due to lack of staff in preferred area , also drinks in the main non preferred pool area were so slow due to refurbishment of a bar so they had to go all the way to preferred bar to get drinks for non preferred area, just seems there's not enough staff . comparing to the pick albatross blu spa in Egypt which was a 4 star, waiter service was way more efficient.

To finish I think this is good resort with some modifications and improvements this could be a real gem, I do think there is slight issues keeping it from feeling real 5 star for me , I would come back depending on the price as I feel the location is beautiful and I think canary islands as a destination is nice. I think I'll probably check out the secrets bahia in fueventura if I come back or go a bit further like Egypt to a rixos/steigenburger to get a proper all inclusive experience as I do feel for the price I paid which is around 1.1k pp I think I can get better.

We had a fabulous 10 night holiday here with amazing staff, in particular Iliana (assisted me with a make up item!), Roberto, Jonaton and Reuben. The spa circuit is amazing we used it nearly every day. Entertainment is low key but the three tenors and the lady soul singer were particularly excellent (would be nice to have someone to introduce them). Beautiful grounds, and just a 15 min walk from Puerto Calero where you can take the water bus to PDC for a change. Pools were cold but refreshing in the heat. We had a pool view room and had a fabulous view.

Couple of points for Management - food needs to be hotter in the restaurants (not sure if heaters over the buffet food were working), some of the gym equipment needs updating and WiFi was a bit disappointing poolside, but regardless we will return.

Overall, we had an enjoyable stay, but there are definitely some areas where the hotel could improve.

The room itself was clean and comfortable; however, I was disappointed with the bathroom. It felt very outdated, and there were cobwebs in the corners, which isn’t what I would expect from a five-star hotel.

The location was good as was not far from the airport and Puerto Calero was walkable and was a nice, pretty walk.

The buffet was probably the biggest let-down for us. The food was quite limited and wasn’t particularly enjoyable. I am quite a picky eater, so on one evening I ended up having cucumber, garlic bread, and ice cream for dinner because there wasn’t much else that appealed to me. On the Italian-themed night, there was only one type of pizza available, which was disappointing. The buffet itself is also quite small however there are quite a few tables, and there can be a wait to be seated as you have to wait for a member of staff to escort you to a table. I think this process could be made much quicker if guests could simply scan their room card at the entrance, which is done but the employees still have to write on a board,allowing the system to register their visit automatically.

On a much more positive note, the à la carte restaurants were excellent. The food was of a very good standard with plenty of choice, and we particularly enjoyed having lunch at the Blue Water Grill each day. Lunch wasn’t served until 3pm, but it was always worth the wait. The waitress who looked after us throughout our stay was brilliant—friendly, attentive, and always provided excellent service. My only criticism is that she really needed more support. On one particularly busy day, she was serving both food and drinks on her own, which meant drinks took a while to arrive. This certainly wasn’t her fault, and I think having at least one additional member of staff would make a big difference during busy periods. The Italian restaurant we used 2 evenings were great! There was quite a lot of choice and the food came quick and was delicious so this shows the standard of food is good so was quite disappointed with the buffet. We found the flexibility of not having to book the à la carte’s a real positive too.

The pools were okay overall. The water was quite cold, but with the warm weather during our stay, it was actually refreshing. However, I did notice that parts of the flooring in the main pool were lifting, which made it look a little run down. I don’t think this is something you would expect at a five-star hotel, and if wear and tear does occur, it should be maintained more promptly. I will insert photos.

Before travelling, I had read several Facebook reviews saying there was never a rush for sunbeds, so I was pleased to hear that. Unfortunately, this wasn’t our experience. On our first morning, after breakfast there were very few sunbeds available, so for the rest of the holiday we found ourselves getting up earlier to secure one. While we always managed to get a good spot, it wasn’t ideal.

The hotel itself was very quiet, which suited us perfectly as we were looking for a relaxing holiday.

Overall, despite a few disappointments with the buffet, the bathroom, and some maintenance issues, we still had a lovely holiday. The excellent à la carte dining, relaxing atmosphere, and fantastic service from the staff at the Blue Water Grill were the highlights of our stay. With a few improvements, this hotel could easily live up to its five-star rating.